Do Hairy Women Smell More Than Shaved Women?
Do Hairy Women Smell More Than Shaved Women?
For years, women have been plucking, shaving, waxing, and
bleaching their body hair. It seems the only good woman is a totally hairless
woman. However, much like felines, the more hairless the woman, the less attractive
we appear to the opposite sex. Why is that, you may be asking yourself? Well,
darling, it's because of pheromones.
“Pheromones? Isn't that something that bees do?” Not quite,
babycakes, but stick with us, and we're going to give you a quick lesson.
OK, So What Are Pheromones?
Pheromones are what your body secretes in your sweat,
saliva, and urine that stimulate sexual arousal and desire in the opposite sex.
It's just like in the animal kingdom, so if you've ever seen the reaction of a
male canine when a female dog goes into heat, you understand the role that
pheromones play when it comes to the opposite sex. People who produce elevated
levels of pheromones are proven to have sexual activity more often, feel more
confident about themselves (likely from getting laid all the damned time), and
draw more attention in general from the opposite sex.
So what does that have to do with the hairless woman we were
discussing above? A whole hell of a lot. Pubic hair and armpit hair are what
helps us hold our pheromones instead of letting them be whisked away. Once the
sweat is removed, odorless pheromones are what remain in a woman's armpit hair.
The hair helps to hold onto those pheromones so that they're in place, working
hard to find your next partner for you. Smelly pheromones are why some people
associate a woman with natural hairy armpits as being dirty or gross. Any
armpit will stink if you do not wash the sweat away, whether it has hair or
not. Women with unshaven hairy armpits are visually distinguishable when they
lift their arms, so people apply a stereotype. Yes, technically a woman with
cute hairy armpits or an extremely hairy pussy “could” get stinky faster than a
woman who shaves because the hairs offer more surface area for bacteria, but
that still does not mean that hairy women are smelly.
Well, Why In The Hell Did We Start Shaving?
Actually, it's been traced back to religious reasons, when
both women and men plucked their hair (damn, ouch) for religious piety. Now,
though, it is only the woman who is expected to continue ripping out her hair
follicles, and not for martyrdom this time around. It is now merely an
aesthetic practice. It was once believed that removing one's body hair was an
act of cleanliness and necessity. However, we now know that having pubic or
underarm hair isn't a dirty practice, as long as the human that has the hair
knows how to bathe properly. Unlike in the Dark Ages, we actually have showers
and loofahs now, so it's really not a problem, as of late anyway.
To leave your pheromones intact if you are one of the
hairless ladies, bathe in hot water without the use of soap, as long as there
isn't any highly offensive odor already happening. If you smell a pair of
sweaty gym shorts left in a sealed plastic bag for a week, by all means, girl,
we're going to need you to lather up. Twice.
So, Hook A Homegirl Up With Those Pheromones
All right, so now that you've gotten the details on the role
that pheromones play in your dating life, or lack thereof, you want to know how
you can jack up those pheromone levels. We understand; it's precisely why we
did the research. First, exercise. Not just sporadically, regular exercise.
Exercising regularly releases your body's toxins by producing sweat. Sweat is a
great medium to get those pheromones front and center on your skin to be
inhaled by your next potential Prince Charming.
You can also increase your pheromone count by taking 30 to
45 milligrams of zinc every day. If you find that your daily multivitamin has
this quantity of zinc or more in it, cool, your Flintstones chewables are
already serving as your wingman in this arena. As we mentioned earlier, don't
use soap in the bath. Instead, wash your body as your regularly would with only
hot water. As long as you don’t smell like ass before the shower, it should
cleanse you just fine and you can continue being one of those sexy hairy
ladies.
How Do I Know My Pheromones Aren't Duds?
Ok, so you know how a group of women who spend a lot of time
together, such as roommates or office mates, end up having menstrual cycles
that sync up together (which is the cruelest trick biology ever played)? Well,
pheromones are responsible for that completely insane trick. We also smell the
best naturally to the people who have a different genetically based immunity
than we do. Nature’s way of ensuring that healthy babies are made is by giving
the child the absolute maximum in immune protection from birth.
Conversely, when you meet someone, and you're just
immediately put off by the whole aura that they are emitting, that is most
likely pheromones at play as well. That's nature's way of saying, “no, girl, he
chews with his mouth open, just walk away,” and you naturally repel one
another, most of the time, without even realizing why it's happening. Unless
he's currently chewing with his mouth open, then it's understood and seconded.
However, this works in both directions. Too much of a good thing is actually a
bad thing in terms of pheromones. It seems the line between turned on and angry
is pretty close to one another when we're appealing to each other's animal
instincts. If it is a time of the month when your pheromones are being extra
crazy, it can repel members of the opposite sex that it usually draws to you.
Keep Your Hair, Keep Those Pheromones
So, in a nutshell, shaving those hairy armpits is actually removing nature’s way of helping you find a mate. When you shave your hairy armpits, pubic hair, and legs, you're removing the pheromone trap and allowing them to be whisked away into some faraway pheromone convention in the sky. If you want to increase your natural attraction to potential mates, and feel more confident in your own skin every day, try keeping your body hair and see what pheromones can do to get you coupled up. I mean, what are the chances that it is worse than online dating? I'm thinking slim to none, girl. If all else fails, you can be one of those hot hairy cam girls!
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